12/01/2022 The Darkest out today!

I have a new single “The Darkest” out today links here on streaming platforms and a live version here with my dear friend Erin Zurflu on harmonies in our home studio.

I wrote The Darkest on a cold snowy morning two years ago.  I set up my Ear Trumpet Labs mic (made in Portland Oregon) and captured my acoustic guitar and lead vocal, then did harmonies, electric guitar and synth….I was supposed to be working on my friend's song - but inspiration caught me so I could procrastinate again…..!

But however I got there, in a matter of a few hours I had recorded something quite sad, melancholy, enchanting, really quite beautiful…. It has sat unmixed for two years as I focused on other things in life and eventually pondered the "why" behind what I do........ what's the point of releasing my song "The Darkest".

Does the world need more sad songs?

I sent "The Darkest" to a dear friend of mine and I asked him this question; "Does the world need more sad songs?" 

..and he said;

"god i love these harmonies and this song…….  yeah, the world always needs a sad song to explain it’s pain…….."

I know when a song tumbles out like this one, that there is some unexplainable magic there.  Is it for me? Yes.  Can it be for others? The answer for me is yes ...whoever it resonates with…

I don't know a lot about the why, but I do know there is good when I follow the mystery of creating beautiful things out of sometimes painful things....I love to see when people freely follow their creative hearts...I feel like that is a life worth living and lets do more of that!

I know I have to keep creating and sharing because this is where the beauty and mystery of life is...can I do this without judging myself....well, I'm constantly working on that... aren't we all?

.

I love this quote from Elizabeth Gilbert:

“Creativity is sacred, and it is not sacred. What we make matters enormously, and it doesn’t matter at all. We toil alone, and we are accompanied by spirits. We are terrified, and we are brave. Art is a crushing chore and a wonderful privilege. Only when we are at our most playful can divinity finally get serious with us. Make space for all these paradoxes to be equally true inside your soul, and I promise—you can make anything. So please calm down now and get back to work, okay? The treasures that are hidden inside you are hoping you will say yes.”

― Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear .

Thanks for listening and reading if you’ve made it this far!  Let's keep creating…

.

Lyrics; 

.

God I like the sunlight and feeling it's golden paintbrush on my skin
Will you still like me when I'm showing the darkest 
the darkest
Will you still want me when I'm being the darkest 
the darkest

I know you like the snow
And feeling it's icy embers on your skin 
It seems like you are
Living your best life your best life
And will you still want me when I'm being the darkest the darkest 

In my dreams I was a river
A current moving through this stagnant dark
Can I.....find the....courage the courage the courage

#newmusic #songwriter #creativity #newsingle #sadsongs #harmonies #friendswhogetit

Lryics:

I Didn't want to take your things.
Stacked up boxes, bags of clothes

I really need sun on skin
nobody knows the way life goes

Then you're gone
Then you're gone

I had a moment thinking I could grasp
Then I realized it was sand in my hand

12/12/2021

My music video for Late Summer is out TODAY!

Late Summer” is the first song to released from our humble home studio in a collection of six songs which will be released as an EP in the new year. 

When I wrote 'Late Summer" we were deep in the isolation of 2020 life, and I had bought some recording gear and was youtube teaching myself how to do all the things I needed to get a great sound happening.  The only time I could get was late into the night when the kids were in bed. 

I was working on recording BVs for Little Ripples and Chris Beland (check out their new music!), which gave me the motivation to keep trying to figure it out.  When the kids when to in-person school at the end of last year I dove into recording my own songs and creativity flew.  It was such therapy to be able to capture these recordings in my home.  Late Summer is important to me because it embodies the timeless melting feeling you get at the beach, where it's easier to connect to the important things, to be in the moment, that magic shift from overthinking to just being.

These songs that will be on the EP were mostly written and recorded on the same day that I wrote them, which to me has a raw quality that is special. It was magical to have the days and my head free to create and I'm excited to share that.  I've learned SO much about recording, mixing and I've explored new instruments and sounds that has been really fun. 

I love the adventure quality of these shots in the video by my husband Bruce, that feeling of exploring and being on a road trip (post the always epic packing job)!

You can hear Late Summer on your fave streaming platform.

It's a sweet feeling to have released my first song made in our home studio! So much learning has happened, and new songs which probably wouldn't have if it wasn't for 2020.

15/08/2019
Living on-top of each other

Life in Big Brown is simple and living on-top of each other is more delightful than I could have dreamed.  Moving the dinner booth into sleep mode, opening the back cupboard and uncurling Flo’s mattress for her night “cubby” and pulling across the lacy curtain that I procured from a second hand shop.  Climbing up the ladder for nightly reading with my big girl in the over cab bed and pulling her curtains I hand-sewed to fit. Hanging with Bruce as the kids sleep in their spaces. Opening the blinds in the morning to the latest outdoor “living room”.  

The ritual of making my own Kombucha, as small as it now is, (which I have been doing for the past 10+ years!)  Cooking simple in my tiny tiny RV kitchen and laughing at how normal this all has become for us, as someone squeezes past my cooking space.  The sound of the coffee pot sputtering out the last few drops of dark delightful liquid. Taking a sponge bath by the light of a flashlight. Making a batch of cookies with the kids but halving the recipe, and still having to cook them in two goes!  Hahaha! Starting up the generator to make a smoothie with my ONE kitchen gadget (second hand of course!!) If I had read some of these things previous to doing what we are doing I would have balked, choked on my dinner and said NO WAY…..NO WAY that would EVER work for us…..but YES… isn’t life a hoot, it actually ALL delights my soul.

The first night we slept in Big Brown our emotions were on high, systems unfamiliar and we awkwardly navigated our settling in to the new life ahead with trepidation for how we would feel as we ventured further from all we knew. After basically never sleeping in the same room together before we left our home in New Zealand I was terrified at how this was going to work!  Now months later we happily navigate the systems and enjoy our slow rhythm of Big Brown life. The uncertainty of where to go, how to route our journey has been the most challenging thing. Those classic moments where the children are having a melter/not getting along.  The daily emotional state of all four of us is always in flux, and the delicate balance between having opportunity and just floundering hangs in a precarious state. But in all this there is delight. There is a call to step out and follow although what is around the corner for us is uncertain, and we feel a deep responsibility to follow and nourish this interest, this whisper of who we are made to be.  

I’m having to step out of my comfort zone in brave bold ways and ask for gigs, negotiate and work on the “business” of my music like never before.   But it’s the little things that delight our souls and spur us on to adventure further, to the possibility and the magic that may lay around the corner. We adventure on with the hope of meeting new people, making new connections, sharing music or discovering a place and community for the first time. Overall we delight in the chance to do what we are doing while looking for the flow of goodness and gratefulness for all we have, and all we meet along the way.  

So I’d recommend a cheers to stepping out in BOLD ways to follow the thing that’s gently knocking inside you.  It’s scary, it’s wild, it’s unknown and mysterious and it’s fabulously YOU.

25/07/2019

NEW Song! Fulltime RV life, MUSIC!

I've got a new song live in studio for you! Check out "July Moon" fresh off the press here>>>>>> read more below……

On May 11th we left NZ with a few suitcases (and 3 guitars!) and arrived in the USA with a dream to create and share music, make new connections and do it with our two girls in tow!

I had the most magical experience creating and recording my album "Till the feeling's right" in 2018 and subsequently touring the West Coast of the States, leaving my family at home in New Zealand for a month. This trip added fuel to my desire to play and share music to a wider community and we dreamed up this RV life to continue doing music+sharing+adventure together as a family!

We set out to make lasting connections through playing music in house concerts and venues across the USA and beyond. By sharing this gift of music we hope to expand our community and enrich the wider world! Making and sharing music makes our world a richer place, and we hope that sharing this music makes your world better too!

I am a huge fan of connecting through playing house concerts! If you have a community of friends you would like to get together and put on a show please let me know we are always looking for opportunities to share music.....

I hope you enjoy the new song!!! Please share it around!! And follow our journey on the links below!!!
xoxoxox

“What you gonna do when you hear that voice?
What you gonna do when you have no choice?
One day you wake up feeling fine
Then there’s darkness on the edge of town

OH….it’s how the dice rolled out
I can’t change a thing
OH….it’s how the cards stacked up
bitter comes with sweet

Are your feet gonna move when you feel that call?
is it stubborn push back, or an open door?
oh I need to feel you close
one day we’ll know how this all turned out

OH…it’s how the dice rolled out
I can’t change a thing
OH….it’s how the cards stacked up
bitter comes with sweet

You keep your cards close that you’ve been dealt
feel the beating in your chest and all the memories
there’s no words left to explain
no easy way to let you down

OH…it’s how the dice rolled out
I can’t change a thing
OH….it’s how the cards stacked up
bitter comes with sweet

Roll on, roll on, roll on……
Roll on, roll on, roll on……

OH…it’s how the dice rolled out
I can’t change a thing
OH….it’s how the cards stacked up
bitter comes with sweet

Roll on, roll on, roll on……
Roll on, roll on, roll on……”

xoxo

4/4/2019

Ok, so we are moving. WE ARE MOVING! No, not just cities, but COUNTRIES! I have to say that we thought this through very thoroughly and have worked extremely hard to make this happen……….but there is no planning that can prepare you for the actual doing of the move, the leaving of one dream and stepping into the call of another.

At the first rumbling of this dream my response was a resounding NO!!!!!!!!!!! NEVER!!!!!!! NEVER EVER!!!! And through my month long tour on the west coast of the States in July/Aug last year and talking this rumbling through with good friends and family along the way I started to warm to the idea, arriving home with a buzz and excitement to move.

Life here in New Zealand is good. In fact it’s great! We have a ragtag farm house on a few acres of established orchard just a five minute drive from the Bay, close to the grandparents, great friends and a fabulous school. This is the longest we’ve ever lived in one place (our usual was to move about two times a year!). When we first looked at this house, it was love at first sight. Gardens/orchard/house. Glorious……I could go on…..but

Many things have lead us to this move back to the States, a big part of it is desiring more opportunity to play music (which is sparse in our rural zone).

As we move through this phase of sorting through our things there is an excitement mixed with moments of sheer terror! But we both feel strongly that this move is for us. We can only do one step at a time and trust that the ground will be there for us to step onto!

We are excited to see where this journey will take our family, hopeful for more opportunities to play music, explore life and adventure together.

My new song “How the dice rolled out” for me sums up knowing that change is coming and finding the courage to accept and step into it.

2/4/2019

I absolutely adore playing music with my dear friends Emily and Sam. We became friends through our connection as neighbours and having babies born close together…….and gradually began to play snippets of music as the children gave us more freedom. In 2017 we embarked on recording my album “Till the feeling’s right” & after it’s completion recording our debut Little Ripples album.

Little Ripples was dreamed up many years ago when Emily and Sam first met, an idea of writing children’s songs that plant simple seeds of idea’s that can contribute to their well-being. It’s a true joy to be a part of the unfolding of the beautiful harmony laden family song dream!

We’ve just come back from a glorious four days of music in Auckland and planning future dates/tours for both my music & Little Ripples.

04/03/2018

Taonga (treasure, gift) + Album release 19th of MAY!!!!!

Lately I've been wearing this Taonga a special friend gave me years ago. The twist in this green stone necklace symbolizes unwavering connection. Like the arms of a twist which always return you'll explore, you'll grow, but at some point you'll always return to the roots. For me, this reminds me of the deep important connection between music and people.

To me it's so amazing how each person is so uniquely made. We all are born with seeds inside of us to grow and nurture. These become our roots. Music is my roots.

To have the courage to face our uniqueness head on, embrace and accept ourselves is the most difficult task. It seems much easier to close that door to the heart and run away from ourselves with distractions, but our roots call us back. Music calls me back every time!
"Music sowed a seed inside, I've been shut down, I've tried to hide. Songs they call from deep to deep, it shakes my core, but it sets me free" (last verse of "Till the Feeling's right").

Each one of us is unique! ALL are important! Following your unique path MATTERS. My music matters! (this is difficult for me to say!)

It's so easy to compare with the next person. But I firmly believe that every life is equally important! I hope my music can be a Taonga in your life, a gift in following your path and finding your roots. - I'm so pleased to be able to finally release my album "Till the feeling's right" 19th of MAY!!!!